What It Really Means (and What It Doesn’t)
There’s a phrase that circulates often among believers—“praying in the Spirit.” For some, it’s a deeply personal way to describe a connection with God during prayer. For others, it’s been turned into a phrase that suggests something emotional, mystical, or even elite. The problem isn’t with the phrase itself—it’s biblical. The problem is with how it’s often misused or misunderstood.
In Ephesians 6:18, Paul writes, “Praying at all times in the Spirit, with all prayer and supplication. To that end keep alert with all perseverance, making supplication for all the saints.” Jude 1:20 uses the same phrase, “But you, beloved, building yourselves up on your most holy faith, praying in the Holy Spirit.” Neither of these passages describes speaking in tongues, chanting, or heightened emotion. They describe prayer that is directed, shaped, and sustained by the Holy Spirit.
Romans 8:26–27 explains it beautifully: “Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what we should pray for as we ought, but the Spirit Himself makes intercession for us with groanings which cannot be uttered. Now He who searches the hearts knows what the mind of the Spirit is, because He makes intercession for the saints according to the will of God.” Those verses tell us that praying in the Spirit is not something we do apart from understanding—it’s something the Spirit does within us when we are surrendered to God’s will.
To pray in the Spirit is to pray from a heart aligned with the will of God, not driven by emotion or formula. It’s the posture of a believer who trusts the Spirit to lead, shape, and refine their prayers. Just as walking in the Spirit (Galatians 5:16) means living under His direction, praying in the Spirit means communicating under His direction. It’s not a style of prayer—it’s a posture of surrender.
When “Praying in the Spirit” Is Misused or Misunderstood
Many sincere believers confuse “praying in the Spirit” with things Scripture never commands. One common misunderstanding is equating it with speaking in tongues. People often point to 1 Corinthians 14:14–15, where Paul says, “For if I pray in a tongue, my spirit prays but my understanding is unfruitful. What is the result then? I will pray with the spirit, and I will also pray with the understanding. I will sing with the spirit, and I will also sing with the understanding.” But Paul’s entire point is about balance and order in worship. He’s not teaching that “praying in tongues” is the same as “praying in the Spirit.” In fact, he adds in verse 19, “Yet in the church I would rather speak five words with my understanding, that I may teach others also, than ten thousand words in a tongue.” True prayer isn’t about volume, style, or language—it’s about understanding and edification. Helping believers become stronger, wiser, and more Christlike.
Another misunderstanding is turning prayer into an emotional event rather than a spiritual act. Some believe they aren’t “really praying in the Spirit” unless they feel something powerful—crying, shouting, trembling. But the fruit of the Spirit includes self-control. Galatians 5:22–23 says “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.” The Holy Spirit doesn’t bypass your mind or override your emotions—He renews them. Romans 12:2 says, “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.” Spirit-led prayer isn’t measured by intensity but by intimacy.
A third misuse happens when people treat praying in the Spirit as proof of deeper spirituality. This leads to division and pride, as if some believers possess a “higher level” of connection with God. Yet Romans 8:9 says, “But you are not in the flesh but in the Spirit, if indeed the Spirit of God dwells in you. Now if anyone does not have the Spirit of Christ, he is not His.” Every believer who belongs to Christ already has the Holy Spirit. The question isn’t whether the Spirit is present—it’s whether He’s being allowed to lead.
Praying in the Spirit is therefore not about display—it’s about dependence. It’s when prayer flows out of the Word, through faith, and under submission to God’s will. Jesus modeled this perfectly in Luke 22:42: “Father, if You are willing, remove this cup from Me; nevertheless, not My will, but Yours, be done.” That is the essence of Spirit-led prayer—complete surrender.
What It Looks Like When We Are Not Praying in the Spirit
If praying in the Spirit means praying with surrender, truth, and alignment, then praying not in the Spirit is the opposite. Scripture shows us what that looks like in many ways.
James 4:3 says, “You ask and do not receive, because you ask wrongly, to spend it on your passions.” That’s prayer driven by selfish motives—when we use prayer to get what we want rather than to align with what God wants.
Hebrews 11:6 says, “Without faith it is impossible to please Him, for whoever would draw near to God must believe that He exists and that He rewards those who seek Him.” Prayer without faith is empty speech. Spirit-led prayer trusts even when it doesn’t see. Flesh-led prayer gives up when it doesn’t get its way.
Matthew 6:7–8 warns about ritualistic, thoughtless prayer: “And when you pray, do not heap up empty phrases as the Gentiles do, for they think that they will be heard for their many words. Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask Him.” Prayer becomes lifeless when it’s repeated without heart, when it’s more about appearance than relationship.
Psalm 66:18 adds, “If I had cherished iniquity in my heart, the Lord would not have listened.” When we pray while holding onto sin and refusing repentance, that prayer is disconnected from the Spirit’s work. The Holy Spirit convicts us of sin—if we ignore that conviction, we’re not praying in step with Him.
Luke 18:11–14 gives another example in Jesus’ parable of the Pharisee and the tax collector. “The Pharisee stood and prayed thus with himself, ‘God, I thank You that I am not like other men—extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even as this tax collector. I fast twice a week; I give tithes of all that I get.’ But the tax collector, standing far off, would not even lift up his eyes to heaven, but beat his breast, saying, ‘God, be merciful to me, a sinner!’ I tell you, this man went down to his house justified rather than the other.” Pride-filled prayer is not Spirit-filled prayer. The Spirit always leads toward humility.
Mark 11:25 also reveals that praying without forgiveness is not praying in the Spirit: “Whenever you stand praying, forgive, if you have anything against anyone, so that your Father also who is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses.” The Spirit of God brings unity and reconciliation. Bitterness and grudges choke out His voice.
Finally, Isaiah 29:13 shows how prayer becomes powerless when it’s divorced from genuine relationship: “This people draw near with their mouth and honor Me with their lips, while their hearts are far from Me.” Prayer without heart, without submission, without the Spirit’s leading—no matter how long or loud—doesn’t reach heaven.
To pray in the Spirit is to pray with understanding, humility, and surrender. It’s not mystical—it’s relational. It’s not emotional manipulation—it’s faithful submission. The Spirit doesn’t come to make our prayers sound spiritual; He comes to make our hearts truly surrendered.
“Praying in the Spirit” is not reserved for a few—it’s the calling of every believer. It’s the difference between repeating words and releasing will. Between ritual and relationship. Between praying for our desires and praying for His.
In the end, the question isn’t how you pray—it’s who’s leading when you do.