A Message on Leadership, Example, and Fellowship

Primary Text: 1 Peter 5:2–3
Key phrase: “being examples to the flock.”

Big Idea:
Fellowship is easy to preach and much harder to practice. The gap between what we preach and how we live is not merely a leadership problem—it can damage our witness to a world that desperately needs to see authentic Christianity.

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OPENING — WHAT I SAW AT THE FESTIVAL

• Fellowship Festival was supposed to be exactly that: fellowship.
• Christians together.
• Churches together.
• Worship.
• Encouragement.
• Evangelism.
• Remembering that God’s Kingdom is bigger than our individual churches.
• Several pastors/speakers came.
• One after another:
  • arrived near speaking time
  • took the platform
  • preached fellowship / evangelism / being the Church
  • left afterward.

Important clarification:

This is not about judging their motives.

I don’t know their schedules.
I don’t know what responsibilities they had.
I don’t know their hearts.

But it raised a question I haven’t been able to shake:

Are we preaching things we aren’t modeling?

Then turn it immediately inward:

• Do I preach service while protecting my comfort?
• Do I preach evangelism while expecting somebody else to reach people?
• Do I preach fellowship while staying inside my own circle?
• Do I preach one Church while protecting my own territory?

1 Peter 5:2–3

Peter tells elders not merely to instruct the flock but to be:

“examples to the flock.”

Key thought:
We’re not only supposed to tell people what following Jesus looks like.

We’re supposed to show them.

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I. JESUS CONDEMNED LEADERS WHO WOULDN’T PRACTICE WHAT THEY TAUGHT

Matthew 23:1–4

“For they preach, but do not practice.”

Notice:

Jesus doesn’t say everything they taught was wrong.

The problem was the disconnect between:

the sermon they preached
and
the life they lived.

Matthew 23 — a few verses later

They loved:

• seats of honor
• best seats in the synagogue
• public recognition
• respectful greetings

They traded the weight of righteousness for the appearance of righteousness.

Main statement

Biblical preaching coming from an unbiblical example still damages the credibility of the message.

This isn’t just pastors.

Ask:

• Parents: Do my children see me doing what I tell them to do?
• Christians: Does my life support what I tell unbelievers?
• Church members: Does my behavior match what I post?
• Husbands/wives: Does my family see the faith I profess publicly?

Personal question

What do you tell someone else to do that you quietly stopped doing yourself?

Somebody eventually notices the gap between the message and the life.

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II. MINISTRY ISN’T WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU HAVE THE MICROPHONE

Jesus’ ministry wasn’t primarily standing and preaching.

Jesus:

• ate with people
• walked with people
• sat with people
• touched the untouchable
• accepted interruptions
• entered homes
• spent ordinary time with His disciples
• washed feet

Mark 10:45

“For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve…”

We have unintentionally created a culture where:

Platform = ministry

while:

• folding chairs
• eating with strangers
• listening
• praying with somebody
• encouraging another believer
• cleaning up
• simply being present

somehow feels less important.

But those things may reveal more about servant leadership than the sermon ever does.

1 Thessalonians 2:8

Paul says:

“…we were ready to share with you not only the gospel of God but also our own selves…”

Paul didn’t merely give them a message.

He gave them himself.

Key statement

Christian ministry isn’t merely giving people a message. It’s giving people yourself.

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III. FELLOWSHIP REQUIRES PRESENCE

You cannot genuinely fellowship from a podium.

And increasingly, you can’t fellowship entirely through a screen.

Hebrews 10:24–25

Why do believers gather?

• stir one another toward love
• encourage good works
• encourage one another

That requires relationship.

Acts 2:42

The early believers devoted themselves to:

• teaching
• fellowship
• breaking bread
• prayer

Teaching mattered.

But teaching was never meant to replace life together.

Church application

We can preach unity while practicing isolation.

A church can pray for revival while knowing almost nothing about believers five miles away.

We can say:

“We’re one body.”

while functioning like:

competing franchises.

Congregational question

• Are you the first person to your car after service?
• Do you know what’s happening in the life of the person sitting near you?
• Does fellowship exist in your life beyond Sunday morning?

Unity that only exists in a mission statement isn’t unity. It’s a slogan.

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IV. THE CHURCH NEEDS EXAMPLES, NOT CELEBRITIES

Use the word celebrity carefully.

This isn’t accusing particular pastors.

It is addressing a cultural tendency.

1 Corinthians 11:1

“Be imitators of me, as I am of Christ.”

That’s an astonishing statement.

Paul effectively says:

Watch me.

Philippians 3:17

“…keep your eyes on those who walk according to the example you have in us.”

Biblical leadership is not:

Listen to what I say.

It is:

Watch how I follow Jesus.

The uncomfortable question

If everyone followed Jesus the way I follow Jesus, what would Christianity look like?

If your children:

• prayed like you
• forgave like you
• handled money like you
• dealt with conflict like you
• treated people like you
• served like you

would that be a good thing?

An audience imitates what it sees, not merely what it is told.

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V. THE STAKES ARE TOO HIGH FOR PERFORMANCE

This moves the sermon beyond church criticism.

Why does any of this matter?

Because:

People are dying in their sins.

Romans 10:14

“How then will they call on him in whom they have not believed?…”

Somebody has to bring the Gospel.

But people also need to see what the Gospel looks like lived out.

The danger

If Christianity becomes:

• a stage
• a sermon
• a performance
• a podcast
• a Sunday event

while other groups offer people:

• community
• belonging
• commitment
• answers
• devotion

we shouldn’t be surprised when people go looking elsewhere.

2 Timothy 4:3–4

People will gather teachers who tell them what they want to hear.

Ephesians 6:12

Our struggle is ultimately spiritual.

This isn’t merely a leadership critique.

It’s a rescue mission.

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VI. TURN IT INWARD

Before applying any of this to someone else:

Ask myself:

If everyone at Northern Light…

• served like I serve
• evangelized like I evangelize
• prayed like I pray
• gave like I give
• sacrificed like I sacrifice
• forgave like I forgive
• showed up like I show up

what kind of church would we have?

I don’t get to preach faithfulness while exempting myself from it.

Then ask everyone:

If every Christian followed Jesus the way you follow Jesus, what would Christianity look like?

In your family?

At work?

In St. Helen?

In this church?

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THE LINE TO LAND

This is probably the sentence to slow down on:

Fellowship is easy to preach and much harder to practice.

And really:

Service is easy to preach.
Sacrifice is easy to preach.
Evangelism is easy to preach.
Forgiveness is easy to preach.
Unity is easy to preach.

Living them is different.

It’s easy to tell somebody to carry a cross while you’re looking for a platform.

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SHOW UP

Show up for people.

Show up for the Church.

Show up for the lost.

Show up when:

• you’re not speaking
• nobody knows your name
• there’s no microphone
• there’s no applause
• you’re not getting recognized
• somebody else has the platform
• nobody will ever know what you did

Key line:

That’s when you find out whether something is ministry or performance.

Jesus didn’t merely preach love.

He showed it.

Jesus didn’t merely preach servanthood.

He washed feet.

Jesus didn’t merely preach sacrifice.

He went to the cross.

If we’re going to tell people:

“Follow Jesus”

then our lives should give them some idea of what following Jesus actually looks like.

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CLOSING — GUIDED PRAYER

Two things to pray about.

1. “God, show me where I’m coming up short.”

Not generally.

Specifically.

• Where doesn’t my life match my profession?
• Where am I telling others to do something I’m not doing?
• Where have I settled for appearances?

2. “God, show me who I need to show up for.”

Not people generally.

Names.

• neighbor
• coworker
• child
• spouse
• friend
• church member
• unbeliever

Who has God placed around me who needs to see Christianity lived before they hear another sermon about it?

Where am I falling short?

And who have You given me to show up for?

Soft music. Silence. Prayer.

If you want something you can glance at while preaching, the entire sermon can be remembered as:

Preach it → Practice it → Be present → Be the example → Remember what’s at stake → Turn it inward → Show up.